Personal Space

I am told that it is a well known fact that we Americans (US citizens) are known for liking our space. I remember when we first arrived in Costa Rica it took me some time to get accustomed to people getting in my personal space standing in line or when they greeted me with the customary hug and kiss the air next to the cheek. Of course if you have already met someone once then this usually becomes an actual kiss the cheek and not the air. In certain parts of South America and Europe you kiss both cheeks.

I have actually grown to enjoy this custom as I feel especially in church that it really shows more of a genuine love for others over our personal space. I have been told that this will be quite awkward when we go back to the states as we will reach in to give the hug and kiss and our friend or acquaintance will pull back a little bit awkwardly at the action. I am saying this for Ken's benefit as he goes to the states the end of this month, so if he reaches in to kiss your cheek please don't take it the wrong way. He's just glad to see you!

But perhaps my strangest experience of having my personal space invaded occurred this last Thursday on a long bus ride back from working in Shell. Let me first set up this scene for those of you unfamiliar with travel in countries outside of the US. First of all I will say that compared to many of my friends in Central America, the buses in Ecuador are actually much like a Greyhound and are fairly comfortable. However, there are a few things that make it virtually impossible to relax for the entire duration of the trip. For example, we spent the first 2 1/2 hours of the trip zooming around the narrow 2 lane roads on the Andes Mountains with sheer drop-offs of several hundred feet and passing trucks around blind curves with double yellow lines. Now I understand why they have a curtain partition between the passengers and the driver. As a side bar to that, if you get motion sickness do not forget your Dramamine like I did. The little sign that offers a bag for people with sickness is just that, a sign. There are no bags.

Of course, what would a 6 hour bus trip be without a few side stops along the way, like every 5 minutes? You see, if you want to take the bus 20 minutes up the road you can. Just flag the driver down and hop on. Hey, not at a bus stop?....no problem. Just tell the driver to pull over and he will be very obliged to do so. Did I tell you that this trip is typically a 41/2 to 5 hour trip by car? Anyway, one bonus is the frequent visitations by people selling things. I don't mind the food people coming on for a quick 5 minute trip to sell some chips, drinks, tamales, bread, etc....but I can honestly say that this is the first trip I have ever taken where I was urged to buy teeth whitener, a booklet on how to control diabetes, 2 different types of ginseng, and a pill to help me sleep (that would have come in handy if I wasn't so concerned about losing my bag on my lap). We also were provided entertainment by a clown with a freaky, gravelly voice that really reminded me of why I don't care too much for clowns in the first place. He wanted us to give him money so he could go and entertain children and people in the hospital and help them get better. (¿En serio?, seriously????)

But I digress. My comfort zone was invaded when an elderly Quichua woman got up too early for her stop. She apparently didn't want to walk back to her seat or for that matter take any of the other numerous empty seats near me in the front, so she sat in my lap. Yes, that's right, she decided to sit in the gringa's lap.

Now I have been in many unusual situations in the last 2 years, but this one just left me absolutely speechless in both my native tongue and Spanish. I really didn't know what to say to the poor old soul. "Hey, I know you're comfortable, but my legs are falling asleep." So, I just sat there with her riding contently on my lap for the next 5 minutes until her stop came up.

So the next time you are standing in line at the post office or the check out of Wal-Mart and someone is just a little too close, take a look and make sure it's not just some kind old little Quichua woman looking for somewhere to lean until she can get through. It might be the kindest deed you've done all day!